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PRESS CLIPPINGS_ |
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BORED OUT OF HIS SKULL
By Chris Bourne, Sinclair User 1985
Fergus McNeill waves a can of Right Guard antiperspirant and suggests
torching a few flies with it by igniting the spray and hoping his hand doesn't get blown
off. Isn't that dangerous? Of course it is, says Fergus. But everybody does it. Don't
they? Well, Fergus...
Dissuaded from courting suicide at the beginning of the interview, Fergus sits down on the
end of his bed and puts a Marillion tape on his hi-fi. Dedicated fans of Delta 4 will know
of Fergus' abiding love for Marillion, even if the rest of us think it sounds just like
Genesis.
"You'd better not say that to Judith when she comes," warns Fergus, "or
she'll pull her knife on you."
Dedicated fans of Delta 4 will know of Fergus' abiding love (?) for Judith. He
bought her the knife.
Fergus McNeill is the nutter behind Delta 4, which he formed while at
school with a few friends. He's 16 now, studying A-levels in Psychology and Communications
at Sixth Form College. Delta 4 specialises in Quilled adventure games of surreal and
lunatic quality, satirising the software industry, and any other targets which present
themselves, with dedicated venom and wonderfully imaginative humour.
"Years ago I bought a ZX-81 and outgrew it in ten minutes," says Fergus,
"So I bought a Spectrum and a copy of Quill and wrote the Dragonstar trilogy. It was
like Classic Adventure but without the interesting bits. You can still buy it, it costs
£4.95 and it's much better now."
Fergus gazes longingly at the Right Guard, clearly bored with all the ancient history. He
finally coughs up the story of how he came to write Quest for the Holy Joystick, a spoof
of the software industry and ZX Microfairs.
"We were so naive we didn't realise we were supposed to send out review copies."
The tale is extremely boring, particularly as it features the monstrous Tony Bridge of
Popular Computing Weekly, which magazine is strongly featured in the Joystick games.
Unwittingly Fergus had hit on the ideal way of getting media coverage without spending
money - feature the magazines in the games.
The follow-up was Return of the Joystick, designed "in between selling the odd game
every forty minutes" at a Microfair. When Gilsoft released the Illustrator, to add
pictures to the Quill adventure writing program, graphics were incorporated and the sequel
released.
"A joystick finale is still in the pipeline," says Fergus. It's to be called
Joystick III - The Search for Yaz, and you'll probably have to play Return of the Joystick
to fully appreciate the point of it all.
Now we move on to the subject of Judith, Fergus' ex-girlfriend who's
already been featured by the insensitive Gremlin last September. "Judith came to
school with a book, Bored of the Rings. We wrote to the publishers, Harvard Lampoon, but
nobody seemed to have heard of them. So we thought, we can't do the book, it's too
obscene. Let's do our own. So we wrote the game, and took it round all the London mags the
next day, and behold everyone loved it, and it even got a Sinclair User Classic. Reviews
are life and death for a small company. On an arcade game a Crash Smash and a Sinclair
User Classic are about the same, but on an adventure game a Sinclair User Classic is worth
a lot more."
That leads Fergus into a long discussion of what adventure games ought to be like. Bored
of the Rings is a three-part extravaganza now marketed by Silversoft, which has given
Fergus the break he needed to sell games through a company with an advertising budget, and
money to pay duplicators and the like.
For graphics, he rates Adventure International, but hates the plots and text interpreter.
Level 9 he says are "odd" but have the best text. "Melbourne House has the
best text interpreter, and it usually messes it up. But I do rate them very highly."
The atmosphere becomes tense, as Judith draws nearer to Fergus' office/bedroom/den. The
posters of the Thompson Twins, Eurythmics, Marillion, Great Space Race, Sinclair User,
Porsche 928 and Bronski Beat begin to ooze blood in anticipation. One particular poster
above his bed is an anti-pollution guide. The circle in the centre is now red, which means
"Evacuate Immediately".
Meanwhile Fergus is explaining about his Scottish roots.
"Everyone up there is obsessed by football," he says. "People ask me
"Do you support Rangers or Celtic?" and I say "No, I'm an atheist." I
used to like Queens Park, a minuscule team with the right to play at Hampden Park. There
were only about 20 people watching."
Fergus doesn't even like arcade games, the heretic. "I hate them. I only play them
very briefly. I like The Rocky Horror Show to be patriotic, and Dark Star and Alien 8.
Don't Buy This was the best from Firebird in a long time. We had good fun with Way of the
Exploding Fist at the PCW show, pretending to be very stupid and letting a Melbourne House
official explain it to us."
Suddenly Judith erupts into the office like a boil whose time has come. Water pistol in
fist, she sprays us in revenge for our unkind cut of a few months back. Let it go on
record - if you ignore the leather jacket, studs, sharpened nails, knife, and Marillion
T-shirt Judith Child is an otherwise demure, attractive and courteous young woman of
obvious talent. Judith is working with Fergus on Robin of Sherlock, the next three part
mega-quest from Delta 4. It's a step forward for Quilled adventures because it allows you
to move backwards and forwards between the three separate programs, and also features
independent characters doing things to each other behind your back.
Apart from Robin Hood and Sherlock, other characters include Red Riding Hood, Goldilocks,
sequences from the Wizard of Oz, Smurfs, Wombles, laxatives, vaseline - "don't forget
the candles," says Judith - an Exploding Friar Tuck, Hurn's (sic) Garden Shed -
"there's a lot of those" - and an NCP car park which follows you wherever you
go.
At the beginning of the game Watson is dead, but Fergus hasn't yet decided whether or not
to have him sit up later and say suitably meaningless Melbourne House-type things.
"Watson is an idiot. The sofa is an idiot. Things I can see..." observes Fergus.
Fergus has never sat down and written a machine code game and says he
probably never will. "Bored of the Rings is the Quill and other people's routines
hacked about a bit," he says.
Judith is looking around the bedroom, change-spotting. "Oh God," she says, with
blood-curdling scorn, "he's personalised the number plates on the Porsche
poster."
She requires a certain amount of persuasion to appear in the photosession, and brandishes
the knife meaningfully. Eventually the lure of the lens overcomes her, and the interview
continues as she poses with Fergus and Ian Willis, who has now joined the merry throng.
Ian programs on the BBC and QL - he's currently converting Bored of the Rings for the
black beast. Other contributors, not present, include Jason Somerville, who works on the
Amstrad and Jon Walker who does artwork and "general scribbling".
"Andrew Sprunt - we call him Spud - does photography and stuff," adds Fergus.
"Jason's a squirt," says Judith. "He's not very nice to me. Ask him how
Jill is..."
"Jason is really small," explains Fergus. "He doesn't have any glaring
features. Jon is more interesting than Spud. Spud tries to arrange million pound mergers
with people. He's hilarious.
"My bullet-proof jerkin is like a shield of steel" he intones, apparently as an
example of Spud humour. It's what Spam says in Bored if you shoot him with a Gatling gun.
The Delta 4 mob has left the old school and they are doing things at
different sixth form colleges. Fergus waxes nostalgic about the good old days at school,
and that warms up Judith, whose conversation has hitherto been limited to cutting
observations dropped into the proceedings like a frozen burger into hot fat.
"Tell him about Nilrac," says Judith. Nilrac turns up as a character in
Skeptical, the bonus "magazine" included with Bored of the Rings on side four.
"He's awful," says Fergus.
"He's a penguin", says Judith.
He's the man who took the computer studies course at their old school, that's who he is.
"He doesn't like Thatcher... he doesn't like anything," says Fergus. "He
likes Bruce Springsteen," comments Judith. Is that a redeeming feature?
This takes us into the realm of how computing ought to be taught in schools. Fergus
reckons what counts is hands-on experience, not just learning how to do it in theory.
According to Fergus, if it was all theory, "there'd be no programmers."
Teachers have to cope with a lot of problems in teaching computers. In the first place,
they may not know much themselves, and what's more they may get people like Delta 4 to
teach. But that won't impress frustrated pupils.
It's much the same story with many young programmers, of course - though maybe not so
vociferously expressed. Programming begins at home. Could a similar bunch of schoolkids
make a go of it today,the way Delta 4 has?
"Not the way we did," says Fergus.
"Bored of the Rings was the first really excellent product we've done. People
starting now would get eaten up."
He says he'd consider working for other companies "but only certain ones, and not on
the basis of going into a room every day and writing stuff."
His aim is to set up a deal with Silversoft of the type Denton Designs has with Beyond and
Ocean.
"I can see why they do it", he says. "Also it means you don't have to sit
up until one in the morning putting horrible little cassette inlays in boxes.
But isn't it a bit sad to see Silversoft all over the game and not Delta 4 ?
"Yes, it is galling. I want me promoted, or Delta 4. They even spelled my name wrong
on the insert."
Names will matter less in future, since Fergus and the rest of them are all due to die
soon in Joystick III. Fergus commits suicide, and there's a tasteful picture of the event
on his bedroom wall.
After that, the games will be written under pseudonyms. Fergus is calling himself the
Jester, and Judith wants to be Desperado, though she's thought about Razzle.
Fergus finally gives into temptation and unleashes the full power of the
blazing Right Guard. Gentle readers, do not try this yourselves. You are not manic
programmers, and you are not about to commit suicide in a Quilled adventure game anyway.
It seems like a good time to make an exit. We'll have to leave the horror of the Delta 4
experience in the Stratford Pizza Chef to another episode - nor is there time to find out
what happens if you type CHRIS BOURNE as an instruction in the third part of Bored of the
Rings. If you get a diatribe against Home Computing Weekly you've typed HCW instead.
"If anybody says Marillion sounds just like Genesis," says Judith, fingering her
blade, "I'll squirt them again." |
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THE GREAT RIP-OFF
By Mel Croucher, Games Machine 1988
MEL - Something happened to you in a toilet when you were 14. Tell us
all the sordid details.
FERGUS - Ha! Ha! Ha! I name the guilty men - Limetree Marketing, now
bankrupt. They offered me five hundred quid for all my programs, and everything I wrote
for the next ten years, can you believe this? I took a day off school to go and see them.
We met in Euston Station in the Superloo. I didn't know what a Superloo was. I do now.
MEL - Within a few months, when you were 15 years old, you'd written
Bored of the Rings, and my old mate Ian Ellery (of CRL) told you to f*** off, right so
far?
FERGUS - Almost, it already had a Sinclair User Classic, and we'd
been doing well mail order with it, but yeah, lan said f*** off. Then he changed his mind.
As a matter of fact Bored went to a different outfit (Silversoft) altogether, the guy in
charge was frequently to be seen floating a few feet above the ground. Know what I mean?
MEL - He was a stilt walker?
FERGUS - Something like that. I was very young, very impressionable,
I couldn't believe that they picked me up from the station in a car for God's sake.
"Just enjoy yourself and we'll pay you money" was the message I got. And that's
what happened. Number One! 15% royalties, 15% retention, no advance. I became a little
star overnight. It was great. I even got my first royalty cheque.
MEL - What did you buy?
FERGUS - A coffee machine, to keep me awake, because they wanted a
sequel by Christmas. We wrote it in under a month from conception to master tape. Things
were pretty weird even then. It actually got to the stage of threats of violence between
certain owners of certain companies. We also got a £400 advance . . . Big Money! I didn't
know any better. Everything was great except for one thing.
MEL - They went bust!
FERGUS - Exactly! It got to the point where we were expected to run a
nonexistent company. Manning the phones, doing the Microfairs, the PR, it was all
brilliant stuff, but the money wasn't exactly coming in.
MEL - The contract?
FERGUS - Don't make me laugh. We were threatened, moral blackmail,
then a certain person quit the country. **** did a runner overnight. We went to another
company on the rebound, and our next game (Robin of Sherlock) flopped. God knows why - it
got every accolade going, but it did really really badly. Pathetic. I could have done
better myself. It fell apart. I had to start looking for advance payments just to cover
myself.
MEL - Did you have any advice, or an accountant, a Limited Company
anything?
FERGUS - I still haven't, Mel. But I'm just about to get all that
organised. My parents were worried about me being liable for things. It's taken me four
years to wise up. You get bullsh**ted all the time. My next big mistake was to take on
programming of a licensing deal in a set time. I practically killed myself.
MEL - What do you mean by that, honestly.
FERGUS - I'd just discovered ProPlus (a (legal) stimulant). Some
sh**head said to me, "If you take some of these, you'll be able to finish on
time". It was a very silly thing to do.
MEL - How old were you when you were being fed drugs?
FERGUS - About sixteen. The certain person tried to get me onto other
stuff, but I've always been a good boy, Uncle Mel, I've never taken anything illegal, so I
sit here in my ignorance saying that it's bad for you. I was getting suspicious, mind. I
didn't sleep for about two weeks after finishing that program, I was so speeded up.
MEL - They pushed you too hard?
FERGUS - You're committed to something, you do it. I was also
becoming a bit of an alcoholic at the time. It wasn't too much fun.
MEL - You said you didn't use drugs.
FERGUS - I said no illegal drugs. Alcohol was how I managed to keep
going, the only chance for relaxation too p*ssed to type. Going from bad to worse. This
sounds a bit melodramatic really, but it was quite bad at the time. It was happening to
loads of young programmers. The magazines are treating you like you're somebody
worthwhile, you're not getting paid for it, they say "Come on Fergus, buy us a drink,
cos you're f***ing rich." You keep up the appearance. You kid yourself that you'll
get paid one day.
MEL - Who's buying lunch?
FERGUS - Me.
MEL - So I'm doing exactly the same to you.
FERGUS - No, I'm doing alright now, you're a friend anyway, so that's
not fair. Besides you need the publicity you poor old sod. Mel Croucher folks, the man who
started it all! Give him a job! OK, basically, it was an awful lot of pressure. I wasn't
ready for it. I couldn't handle it. They had to force me to program. I didn't look well.
MEL - You look well now, the love of a good woman does wonders.
FERGUS - I'm lucky to have her. I tried to keep up an act for the
public but I like the publicity. I loved the autograph hunters. I thought I was a rebel,
but inside I just wanted someone to please give me a rest. Um...
MEL - How dare you eat, keep talking!
FERGUS - Sorry, Sir, I took a bit of badly needed time off. I'd
dropped out of college by then. When I'd got myself back together I started to get four
figure advances, nearly five figures to be honest. I looked at myself, I decided to run
things like a business. Stop relying on other people's gear. Open a bank account.
MEL - Give THE GAMES MACHINE readers some words of wisdom. Suppose
there's a kid out there with a good program.
FERGUS - Don't let the excitement of the moment get to you when
someone shows interest. It's really exciting, but it blinds you to reality. Never sign
anything on the spur of the moment, sleep on it. Shop around. Remain polite, but keep
firm. Nine times out of ten some guy will put his arm round your shoulder after blinding
you with glitz, and say something like "so that's OK then, we agree." And you
sign, and you're dead, and your product is dead to you. When kids phone me up I say
"shop around", for God's sake don't say yes to someone who offers you pie in the
sky. A kid must respect the software house, but they must also respect a 13-year old kid,
who might turn in something good some time in the future. Respect doesn't cost anything.
Finally, only sign away the rights for a particular format for a particular country for a
given advance. There's the merchandising, other formats, other countries, the book, the
film . . .
MEL - The law suit.
FERGUS - You should know, Godfather. |
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MINDFIGHTER review
By Mike Gerrard, Your Sinclair 1988
The French prophet Nostradamus, way back in the 16th century, predicted that
towards the end of the 20th century there would be a massive world war, beginning
somewhere in the Middle East. In view of recent events between Iran and Iraq, and the fact
that several of Nostradamus's prophecies appear to have been uncannily accurate, there
must have been times during the writing of Mindfighter when author Anna Popkess, was more
than a little worried!
Mindfighter began as a book, and this is included in the handsome packaging.
It's 150 pages long, acts as copy protection, and unlike many 'books' that come with
adventure games it's worth reading in its own right. Also in the inch-thick box you get a
Players Guide, a poster - and of course the game itself, which stretches to four parts.
There are both 48K and 128K versions - the smaller one loses a few graphics and the OOPS
command, but it does have a RAM SAVE feature so that's not too bad. A +3 version is a
possibility, but it hasn't been decided yet.
The hero of the adventure is an 11-year-old boy named Robin, with
para-psychological powers. During experiments in present-day Southampton, he projects his
mind forward in time to discover that the city has been devastated by a nuclear holocaust
- some people might wonder how he was able to tell the difference! In fact, the
programmers have taken photos and video images of parts of Southampton and digitised them
to provide some of the graphics. The Spectrum graphics are terrific, among the best I've
seen on the machine they're done in black and white with amazing accuracy, especially when
seen on a good monitor.
The game begins in this post-nuclear world, where Robin's existence is as
real as if he were actually there, though in fact he's also reporting back on what he sees
and what he does, to the scientists in Southampton. He must first survive the horrors in
which he finds himself, gather as much information as he can, and, if possible, travel
back to the present-day in an attempt to prevent the war from happening. One of the
standard science-fiction stories, but this time mixed with thriller elements,
para-psychology, political relevance - and all ideally suited to the adventure game.
The reality of a world shattered by a nuclear war has not been ignored in the
text of the game. As you begin, 'Charred rubble wasteland stretched away all around Robin.
Atop a mound of shattered concrete slabs, he gazed northwards across the distant blackened
landscape. Behind and to the east of him he could just make out the fallen remains of some
high-rise flats. And later on in the game, as Robin picks his way round the city to the
Bargate, he comes across a man being punished for theft by one of the System Guards who
are now in control 'Knowing what the penalty for stealing was, the accused held out his
shaking hand. Slowly, with a blunt knife, the guard began to saw the man's hand off...'
You can see why Anna and collaborator Fergus McNeill decided this wasn't exactly Delta 4
material!
As well as more typical adventure problems, Mindfighter also challenges you
to survive the real-life problems that you would face when trying to survive as an outcast
in this fascist state. You must find shelter at night, find safe food and drink to build
up your strength, and avoid the guards unless you feel strong enough to attack them.
Combat fans will enjoy this part of the game, and even though I don't like fight
sequences, the ones in Mindfighter worked well, and in fact added to the believability of
the whole story.
There are many more people wandering around the game, some of them rather
friendlier than the guards! Daryl is a large man in his twenties, bulky and strong but
sadly he's slightly retarded. A kind act to him might reap rewards later. There's also a
teenager called Robert, though I've yet to discover how friendly or otherwise he might be
- he's happy to take everything I've given him so far, but I haven't got anything out of
him yet! These characters go about their own business, and a big chunk of the program is
given over to controlling their actions. Just like Robin, they have their own physical and
emotional states, the guards have their various strengths, but much of this is invisible
to the player and goes on behind the scenes in the program.
Everything has been done to make the game as playable as possible. If you
just press ENTER at the prompt, you bring up a control panel of icons in the graphic
window. Use the cursor keys to flip the pointer around these and choose your options:
text/graphics, printer on/off, music on/off, verbose/brief descriptions, OOPS, status,
quit, SAVE to RAM/disk/tape and LOAD. A final icon returns you to the game. In no time at
all you find your way round these and can switch between them and save your game in a
matter of seconds.
As for that content, it seems to me to be one of the most exciting adventure
releases for some time on any computer, not just the Spectrum. It's a serious
thought-provoking game, which draws you into the reality of the world it tries to create
so that you do feel like you're down there on the ground living it, not merely playing a
game. I know I've raved about several Spectrum adventures lately, but I make no apologies
for that as advances on 16-bit machines and in programming techniques are filtering down
to benefit the adventures now available in the 8-bit market. It's a Golden Age for
Spectrum adventuring, and anyone who says otherwise will be sentenced to playing with a
Vic-20 for the rest of their days.
rating 9/10 |
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